I went on date #10 today. Now, I realize that this is an impressive number, considering where I started out (Zero). I'm definitely not going out with girls indiscriminately, however. I'm as picky as anyone, so as not to lead anybody on; in fact, I've only been out with 1% of my eHarmony matches. Ladies on that site who I'm actually interested in are very hard to come by. But the 3 (including today's) who I have seen have all had a much higher level of interest in me before we even met.
And so, we met at Starbucks (my routine!). I suffered once again from The Voice Thing. I won't get into it here; I'll just jot out some thoughts in the running Lab Notes entry.
Other than TVT, it was the usual. I had a list of conversation topics in mind (and in my pocket, not that that matters!), and I kept her doing most of the talking. This time, there was a moment of irony that I must share with you.
At some point, my date said that she was doing all of the talking, and that instead, she wanted to hear more about me.
We sat and looked at each other.
"So, tell me more about yourself."
"...."
"What do you want to know?"
"...."
"...."
Ha! Ironic: The "normal," talkative person on the date was the one without any questions to ask. I'm shy, but I had way more questions ready for her than we had time for. She had nothing! So I broke the silence by asking her if she wanted to know my favorite color (a topic from my good 'ol list). I told her it was sky blue (but really, it's powder blue). She said something about hers being pink. Then she asked when my birthday is, and I asked her if she believes in astrology (also on my topics list). She said yes, and I asked her what they said about our signs being together. And so, we were once again rolling along with the conversation.
The moral of the story is that I shouldn't knock the conversation-topics-list-in-mind strategy. It's not enough, but it definitely helps.
I was a little stiff, and I was suffering from the infamous Voice Thing, but overall, the date was alright. This time, it lasted just about 45 minutes, as is always the plan.
She had to go in the opposite direction, but she began walking with me toward my car. Yep, she was walking me to my car! I always document what my dates say at the end, and speculate whether or not it means they want to see me again. For the first time, the girl said the right thing.
She initiated a hug. But it wasn't just any hug. Subtle, but this was a lingering hug, where she held on to me just a tiny bit longer than necessary. She said, "Give me a call! You have my number now."
So, a second-date (which would be only my second second-date ever) looks like a lock. After all, this girl was too interested for me to be able to turn her off completely in 45 minutes. But I can't stand the thought of things ending up the way they did with other girl I saw multiple times (i.e., with her desperately trying to escape me on our fourth date!). If I remain stiff, suffer from TVT, and can't be myself, I know it's going to go precisely in that direction. That can't happen, so I will work on figuring things out and trying new things every chance I get.
And so, we met at Starbucks (my routine!). I suffered once again from The Voice Thing. I won't get into it here; I'll just jot out some thoughts in the running Lab Notes entry.
Other than TVT, it was the usual. I had a list of conversation topics in mind (and in my pocket, not that that matters!), and I kept her doing most of the talking. This time, there was a moment of irony that I must share with you.
At some point, my date said that she was doing all of the talking, and that instead, she wanted to hear more about me.
We sat and looked at each other.
"So, tell me more about yourself."
"...."
"What do you want to know?"
"...."
"...."
Ha! Ironic: The "normal," talkative person on the date was the one without any questions to ask. I'm shy, but I had way more questions ready for her than we had time for. She had nothing! So I broke the silence by asking her if she wanted to know my favorite color (a topic from my good 'ol list). I told her it was sky blue (but really, it's powder blue). She said something about hers being pink. Then she asked when my birthday is, and I asked her if she believes in astrology (also on my topics list). She said yes, and I asked her what they said about our signs being together. And so, we were once again rolling along with the conversation.
The moral of the story is that I shouldn't knock the conversation-topics-list-in-mind strategy. It's not enough, but it definitely helps.
I was a little stiff, and I was suffering from the infamous Voice Thing, but overall, the date was alright. This time, it lasted just about 45 minutes, as is always the plan.
She had to go in the opposite direction, but she began walking with me toward my car. Yep, she was walking me to my car! I always document what my dates say at the end, and speculate whether or not it means they want to see me again. For the first time, the girl said the right thing.
She initiated a hug. But it wasn't just any hug. Subtle, but this was a lingering hug, where she held on to me just a tiny bit longer than necessary. She said, "Give me a call! You have my number now."
So, a second-date (which would be only my second second-date ever) looks like a lock. After all, this girl was too interested for me to be able to turn her off completely in 45 minutes. But I can't stand the thought of things ending up the way they did with other girl I saw multiple times (i.e., with her desperately trying to escape me on our fourth date!). If I remain stiff, suffer from TVT, and can't be myself, I know it's going to go precisely in that direction. That can't happen, so I will work on figuring things out and trying new things every chance I get.
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